The Graf's

Summer Events

2011-10-06T12:55:00.000-07:00

Stepping Stones

2011-08-26T12:56:00.001-07:00

Yesterday Audrey got to actually spend her own money for the first time. Last weekend we had gone to get all the stuff for our 72 hour kits and we got watches for the kids too. Audrey loved it and wanted to wear it all the time and I kept telling her no because they needed to stay in the backpacks. She would ask me almost every day. So one day I told her that if she wanted to use her money to buy her own then she could. She was worried that she wouldn't have enough, so we sat down and counted. She had more than enough and so I let her put all her little coins into a little wallet and we went to pick one out. It was all very exciting. I stressed all the normal things of course that she would have to take care of it and keep it in a special spot. I let her hand the checker her money and everything. I thought it was interesting however another lesson learned more important than all those things. Audrey said something a long the lines of going home to put her money back in her bank. And I had to explain how money works. I think that was the most valuable lesson in teaching her about money. She had it, and earned it, but never got to see what it was good for.

And an extra cute little boy on the side

Sweatiest week of my life

2011-08-03T18:24:00.000-07:00

I have a party I am hosting this weekend, and I wanted to get this project done before. It took a lot of work and isn't perfect yet. Still need to actually lay the pavers and fill the planters and add some eye popping comfy pillows of course. But I am so excited that this is done. I have been wanting to build this since I moved into my house. I didn't think I would ever be able to afford it. Now I have planting space and seating space incorporated into one space.

BEST TOY EVER

2011-08-03T18:22:00.001-07:00

PLUS

EQUALS

The cheapest most fun your kids will have outside all summer.

Come on you know you always wanted to play in a pile of bubbles as a kid!!

COUSINS CAMP

2011-08-03T18:11:00.000-07:00

Cousins camp 2011 was maybe even better than last years. It happened to be over Pioneer Day and so Grandma planed special things so we could help the kids learn a little more appreciation.

Jill did an awesome job in her primary way of sitting all the girls down and telling them the stories of the pioneers, and singing songs with them. I loved her for it. I realized that Audrey had never hear anything about pioneers and I was glad that she did such an amazing job. You can tell she is just engrossed by the stories. We all made little pioneer skirts and bonnets for the girls. Audrey's I made out of a couple of old shirts because I had NO pioneer kinds of material. It turned out super cute, except that her poor bonnet was NOT a toddler size. I did it from a tutorial with no pattern and that is how it goes sometimes.

So we all dressed up and loaded up the "wagon" so they would have to actually do the work. Some of that weight included Ethan who sat there perfectly royally willing to be pulled along. The kids did awesome and it was a lot of fun. We finally made it to "Ft. Harris" (my dad's old boss has a cabin at the end of the road) so we "forged" the stream and got to sit and rest in the shade and eat journey cakes and jerky. The kids really did great and pulled most of the way. Charles help up the rear (the WAY rear) when Ethan had to give up his seat to Tara and walk home. He stopped to talk to another neighbor along our "trek" who apparently thought we were all polygamists.

We got to do other fun things too, like make home made ice cream. Those pictures must be on someone else's camera though. And roast hot dogs by the fire, and giant marshmallows. We took several ATV rides and got to play in the creek. Kids love to throw rocks in water. Who ever said kids need toys?!

Mom also celebrated her birthday at the cabin.

California

2011-08-03T18:06:00.000-07:00

We came home from Utah and got to spend one night in our own beds before rushing off again to California. We had a funeral to go to and decided to squeeze in an extra day to go to the beach as well.

> Audrey has truly grown up and now loves everything about the beach including actually getting wet. Ethan on the other hand barely survived the ordeal. He does enjoy EATING sand though. So he had that!
> Charles and sibling got to catch up with cousins they have not seen in AGES. Isn't it crazy that some of the best reunions are for funerals. I hope everyone I have ever known comes to mine. I love reunions.

Boise

2011-08-03T17:57:00.000-07:00

While on the Idaho Trip we drove the two hours over to Boise- One of my favorite places on earth. I would move there in a heart beat if there were no other factors involved. I was only super sad that Charles did not get to be there AGAIN. I keep wanting him to go so I can convince him this is the best place ever, and he always misses it!

> We went to the science museum which had some cool stuff. One exhibit had this big bar that you pull up and it makes a giant bubble which you can blow out really far. They also had this little tube of mirrors you could stand up in and see a hundred of yourself. Audrey went NUTS in that thing. She laughed so hard.
> Don't you love my picture of why you don't really need a double stroller?!
> We also went to the zoo. The Boise zoo is the best, just the right size with some pretty awesome animals. Now if they only had elephants, our trip would be complete.
> My aunt and uncle have horses which of course Audrey has been talking about non stop since we went two years ago! She was super excited to get to see them and ride again. THANKS STEVE AND NANCY!
> We stayed with my cousin who lives there and it was a lot of fun to get to know her more and to even get a girls night with her and another cousin. Love it.
> We ended the Northern Trip with a couple days in Logan Utah with one of my best friends in her new house built BY HER HUSBAND, from the dirt up! So impressive. I love these people and it was nice to have a couple days to relax from a lot of activity. They were "babysitting" a horse so Audrey got to see another one for a couple days.
This was definitely a little different country life for us. Yards with no walls, a horse with no fence, and a rooster that woke Audrey up in the morning reminded us how nice life is in NON housing development America.
> That is a picture of their AWESOME playhouse I want to build one day. Beautiful.

BEST DAY EVER

2011-08-03T17:51:00.001-07:00

Now this really WAS the best day ever. There is a retired couple that has a farm about an hour from Twin Falls. They have these plastic slides permanently set up on two great big hills on their property. They run water down them and provide tubes and all sorts of stuff TOTALLY free to anyone that has a mind to reserve it six months in advance. It is possibly one of the funnest days I have had in a while. It was so nice outside. The kids had a blast and Audrey even got up the courage to go down on her bum by herself right at the end.

> We also got to go to Dirkies Lake (or something) which is right by Shanoan Falls up there. Is is the perfect little spot right at the top of the dam with all sorts of amazing big trees and a perfect little blocked off water section with sand for the little tikes. LOVE IT.

> Also a picture of the girls doing yoga together. So cute.

Fourth of July

2011-08-03T17:43:00.000-07:00

We actually lit sparklers while Charles was still there on Sunday. So at least he got to be there for that.

> We played a capture the stick game at my cousins house. They have almost the PERFECT yard ever. They are on an acre and a half and it is GORGEOUS. I was not very good at this game. Never much of a sprinter, but I couldn't keep from giggling as I ran, so I was not very sneaky.

>The kids loved the fireworks of course and Ethan kept saying "WOAHW" and Audrey kept saying, "This is the best day EVER!" I think that is slightly influenced by Tangled.

Twin Falls

2011-08-03T17:38:00.000-07:00

We were going to get to spend our "vacation" for the year in Twin Falls. Charles ended up not being able to get it off work. Luckily he has long weekends anyway, and luckily Allegiant Air flies directly to Twin for OOBER cheap. Love it. So he drove with me over night and got to spend some time in Twin for the weekend at least.

> All of us at Twin Falls
> There is another water fall on the other side of town that is really long and cool. You can walk underneath it, and it literally is like 100 feet from the highway. Everyone take note at how awesome Colleen is with one kid on her back, one kid in her arms, and holding Noelle's hand while climbing down the little hill to get there. She is super mom for sure!
> We spent lots of time at the parks, and playing. The girls even got American Flag toes for the 4th!

As of late

2011-08-03T17:34:00.000-07:00

Here are just some cute catch up pictures of the summer.

> Couple of the kids being cute at the dicovery museum.
> Then in the snow in MAY at the cabin. I I love how Audrey is sporting her pajamas along with winter ware.
> We took a tour of the fire department and this was a cute picture of me and the kids.
> One of Ethan falling asleep while waiting for Grandma and Grandpa to come over. He didn't make it obviously
> Playing cute!

My heart sings!

2011-06-18T10:44:00.001-07:00

Selling Charles bed gave me the money to buy the wood for Audrey's bed. I have been wanting to build this for months but since it was a little more complicated with more wood I had to save up. I sold almost all of the functional storage out of Audrey's room so she needed something. But knowing that there might be two kids and beds in this room one day I didn't really want to crowd the walls with extra "storage". Enter Ana White's full size storage bed. I modified it to be full length on the sides and added a footboard. I decided to keep Audrey's existing headboard because I love it so much and I think it still works.

This cost me about $70 to build. That is buying a sheet of 3/4" plywood and a sheet of 1/2" plywood. I did buy the cheapo sheets that are pretty crappy to save about $30. Most of the wood doesn't show but I still think I would upgrade to pre-sanded plywood to save a lot of time and imperfections.

Bed plans

2011-06-06T09:22:00.000-07:00

As asked, here is how I made this bed. You can also head over to ana-white.com She is amazing and has lots of starter projects if you don't have big tools, or are nervous about starting.

Newest Build and sell

2011-06-05T17:01:00.000-07:00

So Charles had a birthday last week. Normally we are so poor and he has such big budget interests that we don't really ever do hardly anything for birthdays around here. You start to care a lot less as an adult don't you find?

Well you all remember that weekend when Charles took the kids to the cabin without me. I drew up some plans to build him a platform bed. He has always liked them and we could of course never afford one. So I drew up the plans and priced it out how much it would be. I contemplated building it that weekend for an early birthday present, but we didn't really have the money and I wanted to finish those other projects first.

So Charles birthday rolls around and I am trying to justify maybe just biting the bullet and spending a little tax return money on a nice gift for him. But of course that money has really been allotted for other things for a while now. I look at the clock at about 11 and think to myself, "I could probably build that bed before he gets home." And I DID!!!

I ran to the store (twice actually because I bought the wrong size wood) and built an entire platform bed in like 5 hours. It didn't get a finish on it or anything because I wanted him to choose. But not bad at all if I do say so myself. I turned out awesome, and we didn't fall through it when we slept on it.

So Charles ever the entrepreneur, challenges me to see if I could sell it and see how much for. I listed it for $160 and had a buyer coming to pay $135 within a few hours. So I made more than 100% profit! It was actually my easiest build yet. Even considering that I had to practically disassemble it twice. It didn't fit up my stairs as one piece. URG

Oh did I forget to mention that this bed cost me $62 to make!!!

Emily's poem

2011-05-07T13:43:00.001-07:00

There have been moments in my life when I have tampered with poetry (or rather rhyming poetically) if there are any professionals out there. I by no means pretend to actually KNOW anything about real poetry, but I like it when words sound good together. Here is what I wrote and read at Emily's funeral as requested by some people.

A PROMISE

A life ended before its prime

Might possibly be the worst pain of all time

I can’t help but think of the things she’ll miss

Like running, dancing, and giggling with bliss

It seems so unfair to have to carry on here

To forget her little face is my greatest fear

There are no words at a time like this

To express the magnitude for the ones we’ll always miss

It feels so unfair when someone is taken from you

Sometimes you feel you’ll never make it through

You ache and it hurts just to be apart

From someone that could fill so much of your heart

Sometimes it seems the pain won’t go away

Some feel they’ll never make it another day

But there is something worse than losing someone you love

It’s not knowing the promise that was sent from above.

A promise of peace and hope is such a sad time

A promise that my little girl will forever be mine

And while living a life without her might be tough

We know we will be together soon enough

Heavenly Father has blessed me beyond belief

To feel peace instead of dwelling in grief

I will try to excel and be my best in this life

So I can return as an eternal mother and wife

May I live a righteous life and my faith never shift

Because an eternal family is God’s greatest gift.

Projects

2011-05-04T07:29:00.000-07:00

Charles has a tendency sometimes to really milk some situations. His boss loss her husband 6 or 7 years ago and told Charles that he could take as much time as he needed. SO he took two full weeks! HEHE. So last week on Wednesday when I asked him if he was going back to work or not and he said no I said, "ok well then lets go somewhere" Why not if you have 6 days off work. Then I told him we could do that or have a project weekend. So he chose that. It was a little cheaper. So we finished some much needed projects and started some new ones. And we listed and sold a bunch of stuff on craigslist. LOVE IT!!

I FINALLY got my "mud room" done totally done. I have this closet by the front door and garage door like most people do. However, I have another closet downstairs so have made do without needing this one. And I REALLY wanted a drop place for all the stuff when you come in the door. So I took the door off built in a bench added some shelves, baskets and hooks, and viola! Instant mud room. Love it.

If you recall I built some little kid Adirondack chairs a couple weeks ago. They were actually a little on the tricky side so I wanted to try out one of Ana's other outdoor chair plans in a kids size and turn it into a bench. It turned out awesome and super cheap and super easy, so tackle this one if you have any interest in building something fun! Audrey was excited to pick out the paint color!

I also started refinishing my cabinets, so will post pics soon!!!

Our Special Experience

2011-04-17T13:17:00.000-07:00

THIS IS A PRETTY PERSONAL ENTRY. BUT I WOULD RATHER ALL THE PEOPLE I LOVE GET TO BE PART OF THIS, AND I DON'T REALLY WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT OVER AND OVER SO THIS IS THE SOLUTION.

Our little baby girl Lauralyn Emily Graf was born yesterday evening. She was able to spend 6 hours on this earth fighting for her life till she went home to be with a more peaceful world.

So in a nutshell leading up to the event, I started having some really low pressure in the afternoon followed by the start of contractions. I called the doctor on call and he suggested that we go into the hospital. We got there and admitted at 4:50 and lots of pain and frustration and rushing later the baby was born at 5:57 pm. It was very fast, but probably very easy. She came super fast. It hurt A LOT of course but we were grateful at how "ease" it went considering she was breech and came out but first. Good thing she was small. She was 2 pounds and 13 inches long. Very small.

They immediately pulled her over to the little warming bed and worked on her for about 20 minutes. The doctor in charge of her came over three different times to tell me it was not going well. It was like she was asking me to tell them to stop trying. I felt a little confused though. I heard them say they did have a heartbeat and I could tell they were still working and that she was surviving, so I don’t know why she would ask me that. Yes keep going, do everything as long as needed. The only thing I could see was them doing chest compressions. She looked so little.

They finally got her to a point where they could take her into the NICU to get her onto a ventilator and try to get her doing better.

Mom and dad came in shortly after that. They said they wanted to be there with us, and I am glad they came. I am glad they got to share all of this with us. The Dr. in charge of her in the NICU came in a could times to tell us what was going on. She said that she was on the ventilator and that they would be watching her heart which had gone up at that point, and her oxygen exchange, which was not great but went up over the next couple hours. However they were concerned about the blood ph because it was really a struggle to get oxygen even started into her.

The next few hours were really a whirl. It went pretty fast in a way. I felt pretty calm and we just waited. We went down to see her in the NICU at about 8:30. I was not super alarmed at all the wires and machinery as might be expected, it was actually less than I thought it might be. I was actually shocked at how little she was and how much I didn’t recognize her. I was sitting in a wheel chair so I didn’t get a great look at her or anything but she almost didn’t feel like mine. I didn’t touch her, I didn’t know if I was allowed to. The nurse talked to us about her and that her stats were going up. We didn’t stay very long. It was kind of weird. This whole thing has just kind of been so distant, almost like I am watching it happen. I haven’t felt a lot of deep anything yet.

We went back to a new room and shortly after that I sent Charles and dad back to give her a blessing. I felt like that was important. Charles recorded it on my phone and we all sat and got to listen to that. The only thing that stood out to me is that he mentioned that the angles might be able to come be with her. I think I kind of knew at that moment that that meant she needed to go home. I didn’t really let myself think that. I have been so calm through this whole thing and that can be mislead as hope I think. Not long after the blessing the doctor from NICU came in and said that she was declining and that she would keep us updated. At that moment I felt almost an urgency to go back and see her. I hadn’t even talked to her. I hadn’t touched her, and I hadn’t told her that I loved her. Moments later they called us to come down right away. We did and there was a bustle of people around her giving her things and doing compressions and bag breathing for her. I think that was the moment it all hit me and I started to cry. I knew we were on our way down. The doctor talked to us and told us there was also something a little off with her spine. She had some contractures anyway from being so squished in the womb with no fluid and that might have led to some problems physically. But they also found a vertebra that was askew in her spine. I am not sure what that meant. They think it might have been a chromosomal problem. We won’t know that for a week or so. I got to touch her little head and talk to her. I told her that her mommy was there and that I loved her and that we were so glad she got to come be with us. They had to give her two more shots of epinephrine to get her heart rate back up. But her oxygen was down again and the ph was dropping again. The doctor said that this is normally what happens. They are able to get a baby into the NICU and they see a slight elevation in the stats for a while but then their little bodies just can’t sustain it and they give out. She said that basically they have just been applying a band aid to a really big wound. There were drastic measures that could be taken but not really with any extra hope that it would help and I think I knew right away it wasn’t right for them to be cutting into her.

We went back to the room and I got a blessing. Dad blessed us with the ability to be calmed by our decision and not second guess or feel inadequate but to know what was right. I think we had both actually decided before the blessing to let her go. That was the worst moment. To have to say those words and say that we weren’t going to try anymore. But while she was talking to us about the more serious problems these thoughts came across my mind. I thought what a blessing modern medicine is. But if this little baby would have been born 30 or 50 years ago, she never would have even made it that far. She never would have been meant to survive. I kind of felt like, maybe this is just more than she needs to handle. Maybe it was never meant to be.

A few more minutes later they called us down again. We told them we were going to just let her go. I just wanted to touch her and hold her and I could tell Charles did too. He kept a hold of her little foot like he wanted her to know we were there. They showed us back to a little room and they unhooked her and brought her back to us so we could be a lone with her. She was the tiniest little thing all bundled up in a blanket. I was worried, I didn’t know if she was gone right away or if she was still with us a little. But after a minute I could tell she was still with us. She still had some little body jerks and she was warm and looked good. We all got to hold her and we told her that her name was Lauralyn Emily Graf and that we were so happy she came to be with us for even just a little while. Then mom and dad came in and we asked them to help us sing a song for her. We sang her I have a Family Here on Earth. I knew I wanted to sing her a song that is what I do to calm my kids. I couldn’t think of which one until right before they brought her in and I knew it was right. We all struggled through it and I don’t think it was real musically astounding, but I wanted her to know those words and that we couldn’t wait to be with her again. Then dad started singing Sleep Sleep till the darkness Ends. I don’t even know if that is the title, but that song seamed really appropriate as well. Then everyone took a turn holding her. Charles told her that we were releasing her to go to sleep and rest and go home now. We sat a little while longer and also sang I am a Child of God. The doctor came in once and told us her heart beat was really low, and then came in a while later and we all knew she was gone. It was so amazing to be able to hold her and be with her in those last moments. I am so grateful that she was able to fight long enough for us to be able to have that with her. I hope she will always know how much we love her. I just know that she needed to be with us for a little while. It felt so right. I hope she has great work to do.

She felt like my babies. When I got to kiss her and hold her little hand. She felt just like when I have done that with my kids. That was amazing. Mom and I both think she looked a lot like Ethan and we both feel that this little girl will be super close to Ethan in some way. They are less than a year and a half apart and I think there will be a strong bond between them somehow. I am a little sad to tell Audrey about all this. She is old enough to understand and she was starting to get excited about it. I am going to have to take down the crib in our room now and tell her the new baby won’t be coming. That makes me really sad for some reason. I was starting to really be ok and excited about having this little baby with us. But, honestly, I think we know that this was the right decision. I never would choose to have my kids have a life of hardship and misery. And I wonder if that is what it might have been. I am just so eternally grateful to know that she is being taken care of and that she can watch over me and hopefully help her mommy to be a better person!

Mom bought this for me for my birthday to fill a much wanted request for an original nice piece of church artwork. She brought it over today to give to us early. It immediately brought tears to my eyes at how appropriate and perfect this it. I hope that this is the peace she feels now!

weekend alone productivity

2011-04-05T14:37:00.000-07:00

My lonely two days without kids let me have a last little project weekend uninterrupted. So even with a half broken nail gun I was able to churn out a little kids table and chairs, and two little kid Adirondack chairs, and a new work bench table for my garage (this one isn't pretty so not pictured!)

FYI- a pregnancy update. Still no idea what we are having. Doc is now having me go in twice a week for monitoring, and in two weeks he is admitting me to the hospital until I give birth! AWESOME. My life with two kids, and busy personality should do just SWELL with that! We are trying not too think about it too much for now. I would rather be safe than sorry though in the overall scheme of things. We should be ok with Charles work schedule and lots of amazing family. Any ideas how to not go CRAZY in the hospital!

No one has given me the impression I will make it past 32 weeks. So luckily it shouldn't be 2 whole months or something crazy like that.

Thoughtful day

2011-04-01T07:10:00.000-07:00

I am ALONE right now. This is the first time in three and a half years that I have had a real true break and gotten to choose what I want to do and when! Charles took the kids up to the cabin for conference weekend. I would have loved to go, but with a diagnosis like, "you could go into labor at any moment" doesn't really send the message, sure go three hours away from Las Vegas and 40 minutes away from any hospital. It is a little crazy to be without your normal responsibilities all day long eh?

Anyway. I have been a little thoughtful and trying to "fix" me as I always am.

I watched a movie last night, Eat Pray Love with Julia Roberts and there was a guy that told her something in it. He said, “Believe in love again”. I have gotten so consumed with all the things that love isn’t enough for. It doesn’t pay the bills, it doesn’t clean the house, and it doesn’t feed the kids or put them to bed. However, there is a reason that we all jump into love so willingly. Maybe it should be enough. Yes it doesn’t do all of those things, but maybe it should be the driving force in our lives that makes all that ok. If there is enough love then it should help us to remember that together we will grow and make it work. It sure is hard as anything I have ever done though! I will try better.

I hope we can all try better.

Everyone read....and Participation Please

2011-03-29T19:35:00.000-07:00

Hey yall. Thanks for your loving remarks. Hopefully we will be able to tell what it is at my appointment Thursday.

So, I don't know if any of the rest of you have high maintenance "go to sleepers" like I do. But my kids basically require, reading time, singing time, and cuddle time. I actually don't mind this schedule seeing as I have accepted the whole hermit lifestyle.... :)

So I thought I would ask everyone's opinions. If you have some, we are always looking for more diversity. So I would like everyone's input on their

1) Top 5 favorite kids books.

2) Top 5 favorite songs to sing to your kids (preferably not a typical nursery song or primary song, we have a wrap on all those)

Here are mine in case you were wondering.
1)
No Matter What by Debi Gliori

Heaven is Having You by Giles Andreae

Parts and More Parts by Tedd Arnold

Alice the Fairy by David Shannon

I Know a Rhino by Charles Fuge

We also really really like all the 'How does a Dinosaur' books. and I love you stinky Face

2) Favorite songs to sing.
- Edelweiss from Sound of Music
- Come to My Garden from the original broadway musical of Secret Garden
- Round Shouldered Man from Secret Garden (FYI almost all the music from this play is AMAZING)
- Stay Awake from Mary Poppins
- Castle in a Cloud from Les Miserables
- And occasionally Wishing you were Somehow Here Again from Phantom (although I am sure I never sing the verses in the right order)!

So read a new book and sing your kids a new song!

Our big news

2011-03-22T20:34:00.001-07:00

So this might be another plea to see who has actually stuck it out being a fan of our blog as my devotion to the blogging world has waned and withered. So I guess we will see.

The Graf household (ours) is expecting our 4th installment (mostly) in July (maybe). How can that even be a sentence? Well this is how, in kind of a reader's digest version.

I found out I was pregnant in December (suspected it while on a cruise so thank you to those of you who joked about all that!!) and in January experienced one day of acute bleeding. I of course thought it was a miscarriage and headed to the doctors the next day. She does an ultrasound and says, "hmmm"...pause. I sit there and wait for an explanation. Those are not exactly sounds you like to hear come out of your doctors mouth right? She tells me I am still pregnant and there is a heart beat. She does send me to a specialist to check out some concerns. I go in for another ultrasound with the pros and he tells me this baby looks fine but there is really low amniotic fluid.

Has anyone else ever even heard of this being a problem? Never knew it could be or something that surprisingly they CAN'T FIX. What does it mean? The baby needs sufficient amount of fluid for it's lungs to develop. And the hopes of a baby surviving with low fluid are really low!

This is after my first appointment with this guy at 12 weeks. This is still time in a pregnancy when you can feasibly miscarry on your own. And he tells me there is a 50% chance that that is what will happen. 25% chance we will require a DNC and a 25% chance of survival. Well thank you LDS church for not letting us think of other options because I am now at 24 weeks and this is what I know:

1. There is more than likely a tear in my sac, which is causing leakage (really annoying....no blood, but still like having a period your entire pregnancy....sweat, ruin like one of the only upsides to being pregnant!!!)
- This is actually the biggest problem at this point. With a tear in the sac you are likely to develop an infection in the uterus and that will send you into preterm labor.

2. We DO NOT want a preterm labor. Technically this baby can survive the entire pregnancy with low fluid and so we are hoping it will hold on as long as possible and let the lungs develop what they can.

3. There are still no numbers or statistics for the chances of this baby. Normal pregnancy 24 weeks: 1 in 10 babies survive, 26 weeks: 7 in 10 babies survive, and 28 weeks it is almost 97%. That however is for a normal pregnancy. I need this to last as long as possible, but no one has said they think I will go full term.

4. This weekend I can now go in for a steroid treatment (couple shots) and this helps the baby's lungs get a jump start. This really only helps a lot if there is already something there for it to help. So we cross our fingers and pray.

5. We do not now, or will we ever know exactly how much lung tissue has grown. You can't see it on ultrasound and there are no definitive tests. All other growth is normal and that apparently is a good sign. There is working kidney function. These are things that could have been a worry but are not now.

6. We still do not know what it is. Baby has been super curled up at the last two ultrasounds. Plus low fluid makes everything inside a lot harder to see. We do know that if it is a girl, chances of growth and survival are a little better. **SHH, I want a girl anyway. I think boys are weird and don't really want two of them together to amplify it all** :)

7. I have now had four appointments with the specialist. As crazy as this whole thing has been, I actually have been more encouraged at each appointment. He doesn't really say things that get my hopes up (he is awesome and takes the time to really talk to us about anything) but I think spiritually I feel a little more hopeful. We learn more each time about what the options are and what the reality is and what could happen. I don't think he expected me to make it this far. And at my appointment three days ago he said, "You have been stable for so long that I don't really expect anything to happen right away. You could feasibly make it to 30 or 32 weeks" Then of course he altered that by say, "Or you could go into labor tonight.....we never really know". But that to me is encouraging.

8. Contrary to what everyone seems to think or expect, I am fine. I think I have been blessed this whole time to kind of be passive about the whole thing. This was not a planned pregnancy and I am not someone that really feels super attached to a pregnancy before it starts moving around in there. That has started happening in the last couple weeks which is good because it gives me a way to monitor things a little on my end. I haven't been overly sad or anything. I don't really have a lot of time to think about it. Only when my kids wake me up at night and I can't go back to sleep right away. I think part of me doesn't really know what to think. My other two pregnancies have been by the book better and easier than average, and now a curve ball. Nothing I did, nothing I can do. How exactly do you deal with it?

I have been a little worried. I have never been good with sick people. I don't know how this would affect a child long term, but no one wishes for a sick child. But I did have a moment of clarity one 2 am morning. I have always been someone that doesn't really get scared about trials. I have a lot of faith in the fact that Heavenly Father knows what we can handle and that is what we do. There isn't really another option. However, I had a calming thought come to me, that even if this baby only has the opportunity to receive a body in this life, that I have done my little part in helping. I will have done my job and Heavenly Father will be proud. I also coyly smiled as the thought also came to me, that I would still be able to have four kids all in all but might only have to raise three on this earth! HEHE. I have been struggling with the thoughts of having a big family. It is expected almost in our church right? But, I just don't know that I can be a good mother to a lot of kids. SHOCKING right? No one ever says things like that. But for me, it is true. So for now, I feel ok about praying for the right thing to happen, because I have faith that it will and that we will deal with it.

So that is really the only reason that I write this out for the world. I would probably keep it a secret seeing it's delicate nature. However, I think that we could probably use all the prayers we can get! Thanks for listening and caring.

Cousins Valentines Party

2011-03-10T09:51:00.001-08:00

We just do fun little cousins get together-s for the little holidays. Have lunch and decorate cookies and simple stuff. So fun. We did Audrey's hair in a cute little heart design! Love it.

Baby Kylee Graf photoshoot

2011-03-10T09:34:00.000-08:00

My brother in law Paul and wife Karee has a beautiful baby girl Kylee. She is so cute and we grabbed a few cute little pics one afternoon at lunch!

Pics of the Month

2011-03-10T08:04:00.000-08:00

A few pics of how much Audrey LOVES her brother. ALL THE TIME!!!

I peek into the den and Audrey is coloring with a permanent marker. True a little red flag goes off in my head, but in an ongoing effort to minimize the times I tell my daughter she can't do things, I let it slide. We have had almost no problems EVER with Audrey coloring on things. I walk in a few minutes later and she has colored her entire left hand and wrist in blue permanent marker. Like fill in coloring not just a couple marks. And then I hear her say, "Mommy Ethan has dots"! Now, he is facing her away from me, and i just know, even before he turns around that she has polka dotted my sons face. And sure enough....

Thankfully I didn't even get mad. Although I think I did say something like, "I can't believe you did this" about a hundred times. Luckily I caught it soon enough and it came right off. Because as we all know, this happened on Saturday. Wouldn't it be my luck to send a pot marked kid to church on Sunday!

Audrey pulls Ethan around all day like this. One day he will be big enough to object!

A little later that day I found this on the trampoline.

I actually missed the picture where she was sitting on her bike holding onto the handle of the wagon like she was ready to go somewhere and take him with her! hehe.

Loves him so much she squeezes into to seesaw with him whether he wants her to or not!

And then I usually see this look of desperation when it is time to step in and save him!

One more super adventure when she stuffed Ethan and everything she could find into a laundry basket and pushed him down the hall.

And poor Ethan at the end of his 11 minutes of good natured putting up with Audrey!

But then there are moments like these where she really does take awesome care of him.

And I know we will probably be ok in the sibling department

AND JUST SOME CUTE OTHER STUFF

I love this little coat on him

Such a big helper

I love this little sweater on him. So cute

Playing catch is our favorite game around here.

Audrey loves to fill things, whether it is laundry baskets, purses, or big backpacks

Ethan likes to kind of hide and play peekabo. He usually backs up into a corner like he needs to keep his eye on you while retreating.

Ethan LOVES to read. And loves this little chair in Audrey's room

And finally a cute little pic of me and the kids all together all looking. How often does that happen!

That dang husband

2011-01-24T10:01:00.000-08:00

We all love our husbands right....I honestly have an awesome one that basically lets me run the show most of the time. However, he gets these random ideas in his head sometimes that I can't really seem to reign in or control. This was one of those events that I will never let him live down!

I was getting ready upstairs for church one day. And I come down minutes before it is time to leave and the bathroom door is locked and I hear the clippers humming!!!!! He had been threatening for a while, but behind that door, yes my husband was giving my son a MOHAWK!!!! I was NOT happy. Minutes before church, there was nothing I could do. I honestly wanted to cry I was so upset. I mean I was not apposed to the idea 100%, but he used a number one on the sides and so he literally looked like a gangster prisoner or something. Luckily he is a cute kid and so everyone else thought it looked cute, but he didn't quite look like my sweet little boy.

Take not of this nice full head of hair that Ethan has pretty much always had!

Poor kid!

I let it stay for a week but required it be evened out by the next sunday for church. It is finally starting to look dark again and grow in. I have had to get used to it, but still can't wait for his nice hair to come back!

Playing in the snow

2011-01-24T09:58:00.000-08:00

I love the usually one day a winter we have that is snows in Vegas! The flakes out by our house were so big as one point. It never stuck but that didn't stop us from getting all bundled up and heading outside. So much fun.

Ethan does not love his big coat to keep him warm.

Little hot cocoa treat to warm ourselves up afterward

Audrey party

2011-01-24T09:56:00.001-08:00

Frosted sugar cookies for all the kids. Which is so simple but so yummy of course. I have the best soft sugar cookie recipe if yall are interested.

We did a yummy salad bar for all adults. It was super yummy!

Audrey birthday

2011-01-24T09:51:00.000-08:00

Audrey's birthday is right after Ethan's. So we did just a little family cupcakes and pizza the day of and then had a family party over the weekend.

Gotta love a three year old that is totally satisfied with a few dollar store gifts on the way home from work! Yeah for glow sticks!

Ethan thinks he is a big boy

Ethan BIrthday

2011-01-24T09:42:00.000-08:00

Ethan turned one right after Thanksgiving so we were able to have lots of family there all squished into our little house. I love little kids. Blow up some balloons, have cake and it is all perfect!

Ethan's own little cake

He did a pretty good job at totally destroying it! I think however that he only ate frosting!

Straight to the sink for a rinse off.

I sure love this little guy!

Random Updates

2011-01-24T09:27:00.000-08:00

My cute little boy is officially walking now. He has known how to do it for about 2 months but I think because of the fact that he has an older sister that is ALWAYS on top of him, he had little desire to venture past the secure. Then one day two weeks ago it clicked and now he toddles belly forward everywhere he goes!

Painting snowflakes at Lauralyn's house. So fun

I let Audrey have at it with the make up brush. Unfortunately she does not understand the concept of less is more with make up quite yet!

Not normally a destroyer, however we have now learned that he is a climber! EEK! Hopefully this doesn't cause too many bruises.

I try to encourage some quiet play time in her room every day. I think it is good for her imagination and other such things. This is how she came downstairs one day! AWESOME!

Mexian Riviera Cruise - LOTS of pictures

2010-12-23T21:14:00.000-08:00

Some of you may remember that almost a year ago I invited anyone that wanted to come with us on a Mexico cruise for Charles 30 birthday! Well we are back and I have peeling legs to show for it! URG! I hate when my legs peel!

We had two other couple go with us. One of them (some friends from Washington totally surprised us. She had never actually told me they weren't coming so I assumed it wasn't in the budget. And voila, they come walking up to our table the first dinner. It was AWEOMSE) The two couples didn't know each other, but amazingly got along fabulously and that made the trip even better!

I don't remember this about past cruises, but the elevators where packed all the time and a total pain to wait for. This pic is after deciding to huff it up 8 flights of stairs to the ice cream!

And man were we serious about that soft serve!

It became quite an art form to see who could get the most perfect cone.

1st day at sea, we hit up the climbing wall.

Now our dear friend Kallen is a big guy. He is at least 6' 5" maybe more.

And this 'little' mexican belay man got a surprise when Kallen JUMPED off the wall ready to repel down. You notice him holding onto the SHIP for dear life. I wasn't quite quick enough to get the shot of him actually two feet off the ground and hanging on!

And our first formal night.....don't we look mormon!

CABO SAN LUCAS

This is on the other side: Divorced beach

Emily jumped in the water full force ready to body surf....A few sand burns later I think she was fully satisfied!

And our authentic taco place. It was awesome and 6 of us ate full meals for like $38!

MAZATLAN
I built a sand castle to show Audrey when we got home.

We rented some equipment for the day and kayaked over to a private island to hang out and play on the beach (I think just to get away from the vendors hounding us mostly)

Kayaks beat the catamaran over there. No wind or something.

Then we got a taxi ride with a few sight stops on the way back to the boat. This guy was awesome. At one point as we were headed uphill, he stopped and shouted back, "hold on". We all kind of laughed, until we looked like this!

But we saw some awesome views at the top

Some of the local construction....screams security right?

PUERTO VIARTA
We rented a van with an awesome guide for the day. We loved it. He took us anywhere we wanted and was way cool and gave us lots of insight. First stop.....

ZIP LINE!!

WAS

AWESOME!

He stopped to show us this banyan tree growing around a palm tree. Pretty cool,

Stopped for lunch and got serenaded....which he then informed us he charged for!!!

Days at sea. Mostly spent eating till we wanted to puke! And other recreational stuff. I even got talked into playing a game of PIG.....some of the players looked a little more professional than others we will just say.

And another formal night ended us off on a good note.

Love to get all blinged out!

Catch Up

2010-12-23T21:04:00.000-08:00

Apparently I didn't put anything up of our Halloween. And since we all know my kids are the cutest of all. Here you go!

Early Christmas

2010-11-03T14:33:00.000-07:00

I can't tell you how much I was like a little kid waiting for Christmas for this day to come. Last week we planted my TREES!!!! YEAH. I guess it comes from some deep seated non Las Vegas roots or something but I need trees around me to be happy. I need to look out my windows and see greenery. I love it. I bought these trees back in July and have been waiting for the HOA to approve them.....which they never did. But I was done waiting. So, here they are. I spent WAY more than I should have, but they came out and planted and them and they come with a year guarantee. We bought two 32 in boxes and a 24 in box to start with. A little over the top for what people usually start with, but these are my shade trees and so it was important to me. They are already 15 feet tall and should be super full in the spring when they have had some time to get established. I might add one more eventually and hopefully some citrus in the future. We will see.

Conference and fall at the cabin!

2010-10-20T21:18:00.001-07:00

Our Hike up to Strawberry Point

Tinfoil Dinners and the love of a good campfire!

Cute kids

I did a little photoshoot with Audrey and the umbrella, I just thought they were all too cute!

Charles being an awesome dad and making dinosaur bones for Audrey to dig up out of the muck (Dr. Seus) and find. She loved it!

Halloween kids

2010-10-20T20:49:00.000-07:00

So I found these super cute glow in the dark pj's at Walmart for $5. Love that they can match for once. So cute. When the lights go out Audrey says, "Mommy, my shirt is blinking"

So this is a new thing. I am about ready to strap Ethan to my hip all day just so she will leave the poor kid alone!!!

"seriously mom, another picture..." ( you can see it in her eyes right?)

But it is moments like these that she totally redeems herself and takes care of him. Innocence is pretty key!

Oh yeah and being cute!

Projects in the fall

2010-10-20T18:52:00.000-07:00

The last several weeks have been run amok with much fun, MUCH work, and the love of fall in the air! Nothing gets me motivated for a great life like fall does. I guess that has paid off. We have gotten much accomplished.

I FINALLY got my den 90% organized. There is now enough carpet showing to actually warrant vacuuming in this room. You can sit on the couch and actually use the coffee table if wanted. There are still a few messes (mostly neatly contained) waiting other projects to get done.

Charles and I did our first official home owners "renovation"type project. We built shelves for our garage. I consider this a HUGE leap forward in our marriage that we actually did this project together and didn't kill each other. I swore a few years ago that I would not EVER work with Charles on a project again. This one was good for me though I guess. He got his way and I "learned" to compromise, and it all worked out really well. Oh yeah, and I got to use power tools! It isn't completely organized and we still need to tackle the tool mess and install our pegboard and accessories but hopefully this weekend! Is it weird that the smell of wood and sawdust makes me pine for fall? Always has, ever since my dad built our own haunted maze out of old scenery backdrops. LOVE IT!

I have finished a couple home made Halloween decorations. I like homemade stuff because it isn't quite so commercial.

I put up a photo collage wall in our kitchen. The big pic will hopefully be for a "not so overdone" nice piece of church artwork.

I made some fun accessories for my bathroom from DI finds, with a little metallic spray paint and glass adhesive, I love them Let's pray my kids listen to me when I ask them to not touch!

Mostly done with the chore charts. They are up on the wall and I just need to add names to each and vinyl to Audrey's. FYI----- Don't buy vinyl from a store!!! It is a super rip off. I just bought 27 sheets (all colors and the same size as you would buy in the store) for $30! off amazon. They sell 2 sheets for $10 at Walmart or Michaels. EW!

Made a slot memo board like this one. Thought this was a nice change on the traditional "WAY overdone ribbon memo boards that I hate.

I have also refinished our kitchen table and made my first KNOCK OFF WOOD build! Unfortunately no impressive pictures yet. I made two Hyde end tables from Ana's site for my dad for his birthday to go up to the cabin as outdoor end tables. It was not exactly an expected gift. LOVE THAT!

Daddy Toes

2010-09-28T21:46:00.001-07:00

So the other day I was sitting with Audrey and I looked down at her feet and realized that she has inherited not my feet. I told her that she had her daddy's big toe.

Some tome laYer that day she was doing something on the ground at ky feet and made a comment about my feet and my 'daddy' toe.

Haha. Love the things kids help you realize don't make any sense.

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Ethan 9 months

2010-09-22T13:19:00.001-07:00

Ethan is actually close to 10 months now, but when we took these pics he was 9 and his cousin Jacob is just 6 weeks older. Cassidy had the idea to go out to Boulder on the train tracks. I think we totally scored and they were so nice. There were guys working out there and we totally thought they were gonna kick us off but didn't. YEA! Here they are. They aren't worked on, but if I wait to get that done, you will never see them...but just imagine them with cute sepia tone and really aged or roughed up look. POTENTIAL

Cheryl Prenatals

2010-09-22T12:13:00.000-07:00

One of my oldest and best friends in the whole world (like been friends since before preschool). Is pregnant. Not only is she pregnant , but having twins. EEK! right. Well, it was perfect. She is gorgeous and loves me enough to let me put her through this crazy photography idea I have been wanting to do for THREE years now! It was one of those moments where creative genius could be in the works, but it didn't happen right away. That poor girl was in the pool at night for like 2 hours while a fiddled, messed, moaned, and made her change position about a hundred times. Finally right at the end when I was about to throw in the towel we mostly got it to where I wanted it! Tell me what you think.

Sorry these are totally unedited, just wanted to at least get them up!

House Projects: Livingroom Clock

2010-09-22T12:05:00.000-07:00

I mentioned how in love with a square clocks I am on my craft blog here. And had it in my mind forever that I wanted to make a really cute big one for my living room to add another element of green to the mix. I need it wherever I can get it! As usual with me I labored over what I wanted it to look like. Here are the results! I love it!

Chore Chart Ideas

2010-09-22T11:59:00.001-07:00

Trying to come up with the perfect ideas for chore charts. My kids are little little and won't be readers for a while so I love the idea of the pictures on this one.

Although being able put a star by your chore also could be really motivating for little ones.

But I want to do rewards and learning about money also. One person did a token system, which I like because then you can get them to do other things not on the chore chart and add to the token jar! You can also reward them with activities or dates with ice cream or things not necessarily only money

Oh, and it has to be CUTE!!! hehe

-Other ideas to include: good behavior stars (being nice to brother), every day responsibilities vs extra chores for more money that help mom.

Love to hear how you all made it work when just starting out the chore idea!

Cutest Blog Ever

2010-09-12T22:33:00.000-07:00

It amazes me that throughout all time, there has always been creativity and new fun things to get excited about. How in the world have I never thought of doing anything like this....at this super cute blog my sister in law found Mila's Day Dreams. Head over and have a little browsing fun!

Here are a few of my favorites.

Dawning of a new age- PLEASE HELP

2010-09-01T11:47:00.000-07:00

I am sad to report that it looks as though my ever so trusted beast of a cell phone (palm treo) has finally kicked it to the curb!!!

So, the ever so tough decision about stay with AT&T or switch to Verizon?

And then trying to decide which phone to get? I abhor the idea of paying an EXTRA$30 a month to get internet on my phone. I refuse to conform to that trend. So am I understanding that the conspiracy of most companies now is that you MUST purchase this if you want a smart phone? That is the most lame rip off scandal EVER!

Can you do all the cool stuff like aps and the such with any phone? Do you have to have the internet to do those? I am so out of it. And what is the new hype about Android? and isn't there a phone called the Droid? Did they do that on purpose to confuse us? What the heck!

I am used to being able to do all normal phone functions as well as:
>extensive calendaring and LIST keeping.
>Syncing my device to ONE place on computer (that is why I like Windows Mobile)
>Play music and MP3
>Pictures
> Storing things on external memory and remove and use wherever I want

I think it would be cool to be able to
> Watch things? I know you can pay for tv subscriptions. Is there a way around that? An app? Do I need the internet for it
> Better camera
> Record video

Someone take a second to enlighten me.

California

2010-08-30T23:16:00.000-07:00

So.... Some of you may know to the great extent that my parents lives are now changing. And since it already happened I can tell you all. My dad got called to be the bishop of the Spanish Ward of the Central Stake. This basically is like them going on another mission....except for five years or longer! Both of them move their records into the Spanish Ward and fully throw themselves into live among a different culture. So it should be interesting.

So my dad and I hurried down for one last beach trip for him and a much needed trip to see one of my best friends Deveney in Ramona (just north east of San Diego) and her new house. We had similar stories as far as buying time and purchase. I had been trying all summer to get down there to see her and take Audrey to the beach.

This was also Ethan's first trip to the beach.

It didn't exactly start out so well. Look at that sad little face.

Of course we chose about the hottest week of the summer to head down there! And this day was no different. Audrey wouldn't touch the sand, and Ethan even cried when I put him on the blanket that was on top of the hot sand! So

So there was a mad little rush for 4 minutes to get them out of cover up clothes, sunblocked, and trying to take pictures of it all seeing as it was Ethan's first time, and then rush down to the water so their little feet didn't burn! WHEW!

So we ate some sand.

Dug up some sand

Did a little sunbathing

"Swallowed da waves" as Audrey says it. Ethan actually decided to test out underwater diving. He is a brave sole at heart (all was fine just some big coughs and stinging eyes I am sure)

And all in all enjoyed the experience! Until it was time to leave and wash off or wipe sand from some sensitive places! I think I actually like the beach in THEORY! :)

We took the kids to the Science Museum at Balboa Park they had this huge 'Jenga' room with literally thousands of these little wood tiles to build anything to your hearts content. So fun.

They also had a room specifically dedicated to toddlers and kids that age. So we mostly hung out there and got to play with giant legos and giant magnet board with giant letters, and a huge ball maze and mini grocery shopping place. So fun.

Audrey got to go on the merry-go-round which she loved! I wanted to make sure to take her and have fun because I am sure I will have to go to therapy for all the times I remember NOT getting to do fun things like that!

Deveney's husband had just gone deep sea fishing where he caught a large Cod. So they treated us to the most awesome seviche ever! It was so good.

The girls (Paisley is Deveney's almost 2 yr old) didn't really mesh super well together. HEHE.. So I think both mom's were a little tired of the words, "we need to share" and "be soft" by the end of three days! But they did have some cute moments and it was fun all the same.

Ethan First hair cut

2010-08-30T23:11:00.000-07:00

This isn't actually the first official snip, Charles did that unbeknown to me one night to take off those few ridiculously long newborn hairs that never fell out.

"What is going on? Why do I have to sit here? Are you kidding me"

" WHA-A-A-T is that?"

Although me managed to come out ok in the end eh?

AH! So sad. I didn't keep it though. Aren't I an awful mother?

Random Update

2010-08-30T22:59:00.000-07:00

Just a random accumulation of pictures for the growth and fun things we have been up too lately.

We like to play outside a lot, although Ethan is not so sure about crawling around out there. He just ventured into even moving around. So he has developed and alternative....

Completely practical way of getting around if you ask me!

These are the pics that will be framed especially for the kids bathroom above their towels!

I had to teach in relief society a couple weeks ago and I got all in the mood I guess and actually got FULLY glammed out READY for the first time in I can't tell you how long. I also tried out the curls that everyone else has been doing for a year now! How does it look?

Audrey discovered the tent put away "conveniently" in it's hiding place. So we broke it out and let them play. Ethan actually crawled through the tunnel. Audrey wouldn't even do it when she was 14 months old or so.

Oh look how home own-erey we are being!

Ethan first time undoing the entire roll of toilet paper. Funny how satisfied he looks as he scurries away before I can even get a pic of him sitting in the pile!

We are pretty lazy around here at breakfast time. I realize now that you can't quite tell in this pic that he is totally lounging in against the arm completely unable to muster up the strength to hold his head up!

And his newest discovery today! I am small enough to fit into the entertainment center!

OMGoodness

2010-08-17T12:00:00.000-07:00

So you know that little email how I said P90X was not that big a deal!!!!

That just goes to show you how long it has been since I worked out seriously. Why in the world would I think that an arm workout was going to really really get my heart rate up? That almost never happens when you are just lifting.

It literally took me 2 hours to warm up enough to feel like I could move this morning. Everything north of my hips hurt this morning. THEN>>> I was crazy enough to choose plyometrics (ie jump training) as my second day workout. It was just about the longest hour of my life. I kept thinking, I can't do this a whole hour! I don't have the power! But I only took one break longer than they did and the rest I got through! I didn't keep up with them by any means, but I got my heart rate up higher than it has been a long time!

AWESOME! Just thought you should know.

Audrey kept asking me why I was breathing hard! hehe. Then after when I was stretching out, she came to climb on my back for a 'horsey ride' and stopped dead in her climb when she put her hand on my back and exclaimed, "mommy you soakin wet!"

HAHA love it!~

Torture

2010-08-16T22:08:00.000-07:00

I started my first day of hour long intensity and torture of P90X today.

It actually wasn't so awful. I wasn't super tired throughout the workout, but about 10 minutes after I felt like I could hardly lift my arm to talk on my phone, and I am feeling it tonight. I am hoping this will be interesting enough for me to really get in shape for my cruise in December!

Wish me luck!

Cousins Camp

2010-08-10T22:57:00.000-07:00

We had our first annual Austin cousins camp. Audrey had been excited about it for a month. Ever since we were at the cabin at the end of June and I told her we would be coming back soon for cousins camp. Couple of nights she cried because she wanted to go there. HAHA.

I actually the think the whole experience went alarmingly well for 6 little ones under the age of 5 and all the adults and grandparents responsible for keeping them in line. The only major catastrophe was of course when we wanted to go take THE family picture up in the field of flowers. Guess who's kid CRIED and wouldn't cooperate. Yep that would be mine. So remember all those months ago when everyone said, "Oh your little Audrey is so perfect at taking pictures, She sure knows how to perform, she is never going to give you trouble." Yeah well you jinxed me. The perfect picture moment and this is the best we could come up with

And maybe one of the only shots I got where she would stay with the other girls! URG! AUDREY! Just SMILE and BE HAPPY!
Funny how they just don't listen eh?

My boys!

This picture is a result of the next one. But it embodies perfectly this laugh that my mom has that each of her children know well and adore

Truly letting it loose

Nathan and his "smokin hot wife" as we like to call her. I love this pic of them!

Every father should have a picture like this with his daughters!

This is totally a face I would hang very largely on my wall! haha love it

She was so distraught over whatever it was

And then totally pooped out by the end of it all!

Home made ice cream. So fun and so easy. But cold!

And enjoying our labors!

Cool Uncle Charles reading stories
Bed time stories

Grandsma's pretty girls ( and one stinking cute boy) all ready for church

Personally I can't get enough of this pout/smirk
Cute one though
Ethan wasn't so sure of the big bouquet

So we minimalized

Big girl of the pack. She was super helpful and had a cute moment when they were all eating breakfast and I walked in, and she was trying to get all the kids attention and full on giving them a little home eveing lesson about Heavenly Father and the Holy Ghost. SO CUTE!
Having a little trouble with my flash

Finger action games, songs, and stories

My personal favorite pastime at the cabin. Sitting on the deck couches, all wrapped up drinking hot cocoa and watching it pour! Nature delivered for me and I was thankful. Is there anything else closer to perfection?

I ran inside so fast to get my camera and ordered dad out of his chair immediately to get this shot. I have one almost identical to it of Audrey first discovering the rain. So cute.

Some liked to sit back a little and be safer

Planting the first official cousin camp tree

And then of course we had to cater to all these little girls princessessness in them. How many mom's does it take to paint 40 fingers and 40 toes?
Maybe not as many as you think? :)

Ring around the Rosie

A little manly game

Some safe finger painting. I swear someone should kiss the person that thought of color wonder!!!

Audrey said her favorite part of the whole thing was going on a walk with "Papa" to see the water and throw rocks!

Ethan is 8 monhs old

2010-08-10T22:40:00.000-07:00

And what a cute bug at that he is. I can't believe we have even made it this far. I am not gonna lie, number 2 really rocked my world. But of course he is the cutest thing on the planet and I wouldn't have it any other way.

List of accomplishments.
> Crawling at 7 and a half months
> Completely perfected the art of squealing (very manly like) to get his mother to pay attention to his every whim and need
> Mostly sleeping through the night with no feedings(we have travel and sickness to thank for inconsistencies in this not happening sooner)
> Mastered climbing the stairs, and now looks up at them longingly through the iron crossbeams of a baby gate!
> Loves to crawl around with bead necklaces hanging from his mouth!
> Loves to be growled at and chased around the floor. He isn't very good at the running away part yet. Good thing he likes his tummy getting eaten up just as much.
> Is pretty much ready to devour any food (or sometimes anything on the ground) that is in front of him.
> Handles the beatings and being dragged around the house by his big sister with great aptitude. Poor Kid! You didn't know 2 and a half was big enough to carry a baby around or pull him from the floor to on top of the bed did you?

All in all it has been a super fun eight months. I am glad however that we are on the looking back end as we have started into some of my favorite times of toddlerhood.

House: Audrey's Room

2010-07-22T12:53:00.001-07:00

I am so excited about Audrey's room. If I weren't married and didn't have to worry about pleasing a man in the same room with me, I would go totally girly and bling it out in every lush girly way I could. So, that is what Audrey got! The pictures don't do it justice of course and it isn't totally finished yet, but here it is 95% of the way done!

You can see just a hint of it in these pics, but I got this awesome black shag rug at Home Fabrics. Originally I had wanted to go with a white sheepskin, but I decided white was NOT a good idea for a girl who likes to drink milk in bed. I went to Home Fabrics on a whim one day and they had this last black shag outside, so I got it at 20% off. At $70 it was more than I had spent on Ethan's rug and a little hard to swallow but it fits perfectly and is a lot nicer than his anyway!

FYI: this paint color took a specific primer and then two coats of red. I think I was super conscious of saving $7 so I went with the cheaper paint. DON"T EVER GO WITH CHEAPER PAINT!!!

Paint treatment. I was going to do pinstripes, but decided that wasn't quite formal or girly enough. And I didn't want people to think 'yankees uniform'. So I cut out three different stencils, (thank you to the cricut once again) and bought a metallic paint. It is a white on white so it gives it just enough of a shimmer to look different in some light. It looks AWESOME. But definitely needs to be appreciated in person. Come over!

Shelving cluster for girly stuff. I have a little poem I am printing out about kids growing up and taking time to play. I think it is appropriate. This cluster is right above her chair and reading corner spot.

True Bling! I found this mirror at Habitat for Humanity for $10. It was perfect, just enough of an arch to make it girly, and is has probably $7 worth of little rhinestone beads glued around the edges. It took the longest to actually sort through my entire bag to sort out the sizes! EEK! I am thinking I will probably add a little etching at the bottom that says something like, "True beauty lies within" What you think?

Audrey's chandelier was something of much thought and provocation. I of course would have loved to make it out of crystals or beads. But that would have cost me a small fortune. Definitely not cost effective or worth it. Then it struck me one day in the middle of doing something else, sequins. I ordered a 100 yard spool of sequins and cut them and hot glued them to an embroidery hoop. Looks pretty good for like $8 eh? I am thinking it needs some rhinestones glued around the circle at the top though.

This is the only thing I had for Audrey that matched her room scheme when she was born. I agonized over this design with a very patient Cassidy for weeks! I still like the finished design. Although I am thinking it still needs a little something. So I might screw crystal knobs into black blocks to hang these from and add a little more substance. What you think?

This is the little girl quilt like block Colleen made perfectly for Audrey's room. It patiently awaits a frame with glass in it. I have updated pictures for her frames on the way and I am thinking of screen printing a swirl design on this lamp if my fabric doesn't stretch that far.

Still needs a black chair rail at the cut in line and a clock that I can bling out in some way. So I will update when finished. Ask about how anything else was done and I will tell ya!

One of the TOP FIVE moments of our lives

2010-06-30T14:24:00.000-07:00

I would say that the top five moments in my life have been getting married, giving birth to two kids, and now becoming a home owner.

So now you all know the reason for any lack in myself as a human being over the past year. Basically because almost every waking moment has been spent thinking about, being excited for, and planning for this house!!!

For those of you who get lost in the timeline of life like the rest of us, or for those who just don't know. We have been living with my parents for the past 6 YEARS!!!! and the entirety of out marriage. We have now joined one of the coolest clubs ever in becoming home owners. We are excited beyond measure and feel so incredibly blessed that for whatever reason, the Lord watched out for us and made this happen all at the PERFECT timing for us.

We have been working on this process for over a year. We started looking at houses in March of LAST YEAR. Then the lender we went to told us about a first time home buyers program where they will help you with down payment.... SWEET. So for the next 4 months we dealt with getting everything on the face of the planet to those people. It was a way bigger pain but totally worth it. If you think you can't buy a house, please look into the non profit agencies in your area. I never knew these exhisted and they saved us from having to put basically all of our own money into it! So finally then everything was in order to start looking which we did at the end of October of 2009; three lenders, two downpayment companies and two realtors later. We bid on one house and lost, and then fell in love with the one we bought. We put in a competetive bid two days after it had been on the market. They excepted and then we started the VERY LONG HAUL of waiting for everything to go through on our short sale. Man is this an emotional roller coaster as anyone who has every bought knows. We had our offer accepted on November 9th and we literally signed closing papers on June 9th! 7 months later!!!!!!! It was draining and long, but I feel unbelievably blessed and knew it was right because Heavenly Father blessed me to not be impatient for most of the time. (I was as surprised as the rest of you) Now it is all a memory and it almost feels like we have always been here (minus the HUGE mess that it all still is) It is weird because I almost can't remember living at my parents house. So, I take this as a sign that we did the right thing.

The kids love it and have been spectacular. We moved within 2 miles of two of Charles sisters, 2 of his brothers, and his mom. We are blessed to be so close and they have all been amazing. Taking my kids for hours on end so I can feel like I am accomplishing something more than thirty minutes at a time.

We got our keys on Wednesday and we moved on Saturday. I was adamant about getting as much painted as possible before we moved in and getting everything cleaned including carpets. Not as much happened as I would have liked. But at least we got all the rooms painted that needed furniture in them, and we are working on the rest still. This meant however that I basically painted for almost 30 HOURS STRAIGHT. I slept only three hours the first night and worked myself into complete exhaustion by 6 the next night and wanted to sit on a COUCH and just cry. My dad was awesome and helped almost the entire time, and so did two of my sister in laws. They were awesome to stay up until two in the morning the first night with me.

I chose to be a little bold and different and most of the house is grey. I love it. The kitchen is two shades darker than the other rooms, but with 4 big windows and lime green accents I think it looks AWESOME. It is about the color of duct tape, as my dad so eloquently put it.

In this picture you can see how big our kitchen/dining area is. We decided to turn the end wall/right corner into an office space (down where the computer is now). We bought cabinets at habitat for humanity for $20 a piece and counter tops at Home Depot and hopefully the brothers will be putting them in this weekend. There is much that is waiting to be organized because this is not done yet. Then hopefully in the fall or begining of the year I will undertake the project of refinishing all cabinets into white. With the dark walls and bright accent I think it will look AMAZING.

We bought this house mostly because of the backyard size. We had actually gone through these models two years ago when they were new and this is the model that I loved. So we are thrilled to be saving about $100,000 from what they were back then. The yard isn't huge but it is way better than LOTS of starter homes out there and we are excited. I have big plans, which I will have to improvise a little with the addition of this monstrosity of a trampoline we were given for free. I couldn't complain and we all have fond memories of trampolines right?

The house is in a super nice community with an enormous HOA -which is why we thought we couldn't afford these homes- but they take care of all the front yards! So that guarantees nice upkeep and quality of neighborhood. We got this house for a total steel so we decided that it was worth it. It sits in a little half culdisak as do our neighbors behind us so it doesn't feel all closed in like many homes. It is 1830 square feet with three bedrooms, two and a half baths and a den downstairs. It actually has really good storage as far as closets and extra little nooks. And now having been in it three weeks. I can't really think of anything about it I am unhappy with. There is even a little nook under the stairs in the den for my giant craft desk. I am excited about that.
We are super excited and hope we will have many visitors. I will be sure to post pictures as projects get completed and everything settles into place! Thank you all for all your love and blessings. Come visit us!

LONG TIME COMING- Big Project = Big Blog Post

2010-05-28T23:35:00.001-07:00

In true motherhood obsession, I took on the mother load of all projects. A year ago some friends and I were all talking about getting together to make our kids quiet books for church. We came up with some fun ideas but alas, new babies came and life got pretty busy for all of us.

So for some reason the time had come and I decided to tackle it. I agonized for weeks and weeks about the style of how I wanted it to look. Do I do everything out of felt, do I draw on fabric with fabric markers, do I design each page myself? Then I searched and searches everywhere online that I could to find some ideas, and came up with a few of my own. I will admit that Audrey (at 2.5 years old) is too old for some of the cute ideas out there. I wanted her book to be a little more interactive and challenging in her though process than pages with buttons and lift tabs. She has regular books that do that. Anyway, there is nothing worse than when a project turns out less than mediocre when you put so much effort into it.

So here is how it turned out. I can't believe it turned out so amazingly awesome I must say so myself. I better get a comment from EVERYONE that reads this, to tell me how AMAZING I am for doing this for my daughter and how stinking cute it turned out! HAHAHAHA

My final book pages measure 10 x 11 inches and the cover is 11.5 x 12.5. The pages in these pics are all unfinished but if you see in the final book pages I sewed them inside out and then flipped them and finished them like you would a pillow case.

I used a combination of hand drawn things ( the kites on this page, and clip art with iron on transfer paper) That way I didn't take quite as long as it might have if i had had to cut all those shapes out, and heaven forbid come up with decent art work. The point of this page is matching patterns. I didn't actually do a match for each kite because I like that she has to "search" through some extras to find the matching pattern.

Iron on for the face, and I ended up using tacky glue to put the pieces of yarn in place. Worked like a charm.

I wanted something to help her count. She already knows how to count but this page helps with the added bonus of learning to count one thing at a time. funny how you don't ever think about the "stages" of learning to count.

This is a page she can grow in to. The hands spin

The ark opens like a drawbridge with the animals inside.

Once again a page where her being older and already knowing her animals and sounds attributed to this outcome, Finger puppets. This is probably her favorite page. She loves to have me stick all of these on her tiny little fingers.

Learns to set the table and how to open a belt buckle.

I have seen an apple tree in almost every book out there, but I didn't think there was actually much point to just learning to stick them on! This is a great way to learn your family history early. Unfortunately with 7 kids on the Charles's side, I don't think she will be getting a Graf family tree.

Once again the wonder of iron on made this page so easy and so much better.

So simple but this one turned out super cute. Fun little game thrown in the mix.

Right now I only have the one set of coins to explain the concept of tithing, but later you can add lots more to help learn to count the worth of money.

Pretty self explanatory. I just traced my own shoe.

Pockets for the letters of the alphabet and then an entire page with rows of velcro where for now she can practice her ABC's and eventually spell words of sentences.

Cute page where she can write letters and put them in the mailbox, eventually teaching how to address letters and put a stamp on it

Printed out a wintry scene on iron on and then built all the snowman pieces out of felt, each piece comes off.

I decided to make kind of a zipper folder cover for the whole thing to stay in so that if any of the little pieces fall out, hopefully they don't get lost. Plus I used pretty sturdy iron on interfacing to make it lots more sturdy but still have a pretty soft appeal to be tossed around and things. I was so excited at how cute this cover turned out. I didn't have a pattern, I just kind of dreamed it up in my head. I cut out two layers of fabric about an inch and a half larger than my pages ended up being. I might actually do it more if anyone cares to follow my technique. Then ironed one piece to sturdy interfacing, and then heat bond onto the other piece so that the finished two pieces could eventually be bonded together. I added all the front page accessories and then bonded the front and back of the "folder" together. Then I ran a zipper all the way around the inside of the folder. Then I decided to use bias tape to cover the unfinished edges.

I ended up punching the brad holes into each page to turn it into a "three ring binder". this way you can take each page out or add more pages if you want.

I want to advise also, a SUPER easy way to do some of this stuff is with the heaven sent machine called a CRICUT. My sister in law has one and I knocked out the titles for each page in like a half hour. It was awesome! Saved me lots of cutting. Sanks Cassidy.

NOTES:
-If you are making things that come off the pages strictly out of felt ( like in the tic tac toe game) I would recommend using a thicker interfacing to keep them sturdy. Felt stretches in the hands of curious two years old's.

- I used a thicker interfacing on each page to help it hold it's own and then when sewn together each page (which is actually two thick) is quite sustainable. Some people just use felt alone as the page, or I have seen muslin or straight pellon used. Pretty much up to you and how you want it to feel.

- I spent very little on this project, I only had to buy some interfacing, the cute cover fabric, the zipper (need at least a 36 in) and the iron on paper (which is actually kind of expensive so do a test print, and remember to change your paper setting in your printer or reverse your image.) All other fabric and felt was stuff I had.

- DO NOT re-iron anything with the iron on transfer paper on it. It will stick to whatever is against it. I did that on the clock and the felt from the hands got stuck in the clock face. URG!!

Summer Food

2010-05-04T07:12:00.000-07:00

Is there anything more divine than real Italian bruschetta with fresh basil and enough garlic to taste it for days?!

I think not! And it's healthy!

Bruschetta with Tomato and Basil

Bruschetta with Tomato and Basil Recipe

INGREDIENTS

6 or 7 ripe plum tomatoes (about 1 1/2 lbs)
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil
1 teaspoon balsamic vinegar
6-8 fresh basil leaves, chopped.
Salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste

1 baguette French bread or similar Italian bread
1/4 cup olive oil

METHOD

1 Prepare the tomatoes first. Parboil the tomatoes for one minute in boiling water that has just been removed from the burner. Drain. Using a sharp small knife, remove the skins of the tomatoes. (If the tomatoes are too hot, you can protect your finger tips by rubbing them with an ice cube between tomatoes.) Once the tomatoes are peeled, cut them in halves or quarters and remove the seeds and juice from their centers. Also cut out and discard the stem area. Why use plum tomatoes instead of regular tomatoes? The skins are much thicker and there are fewer seeds and less juice.

2 Make sure there is a top rack in place in your oven. Turn on the oven to 450°F to preheat.

3 While the oven is heating, chop up the tomatoes finely. Put tomatoes, garlic, 1 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil, vinegar in a bowl and mix. Add the chopped basil. Add salt and pepper to taste.

4 Slice the baguette on a diagonal about 1/2 inch thick slices. Coat one side of each slice with olive oil using a pastry brush. Place on a cooking sheet, olive oil side down. You will want to toast them in the top rack in your oven, so you may need to do these in batches depending on the size of your oven. Once the oven has reached 450°F, place a tray of bread slices in the oven on the top rack. Toast for 5-6 minutes, until the bread just begins to turn golden brown.

Alternatively, you can toast the bread without coating it in olive oil first. Toast on a griddle for 1 minute on each side. Take a sharp knife and score each slice 3 times. Rub some garlic in the slices and drizzle half a teaspoon of olive oil on each slice. This is the more traditional method of making bruschetta.

5 Align the bread on a serving platter, olive oil side up. Either place the tomato topping in a bowl separately with a spoon for people to serve themselves over the bread, or place some topping on each slice of bread and serve. If you top each slice with the tomatoes, do it right before serving or the bread may get soggy.

Recipes

2010-04-20T21:15:00.001-07:00

I wanted to share a couple of my favorite recipes for yall!

CINNAMON ROASTED ALMONDS

This is like eating candy without the worry of it being bad for you....almost. It does have sugar in it but I kid you not these things are ADDICTING. Try them, so easy, so yummy

Ingredients

1 egg white
1 teaspoon cold water
4 cups whole almonds
1/2 cup white sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

Directions

Preheat oven to 250 degrees F (120 degrees C). Lightly grease a 10x15 inch jellyroll pan.
Lightly beat the egg white; add water, and beat until frothy but not stiff. Add the nuts, and stir until well coated. Mix the sugar, salt, and cinnamon, and sprinkle over the nuts. Toss to coat, and spread evenly on the prepared pan.
Bake for 1 hour in the preheated oven, stirring occasionally, until golden. Allow to cool, then store nuts in airtight containers.

AMISH WHITE BREAD

This is the most amazing bread EVER! It is so good. Especially if you use bread flour. This one SAVED me when I was on no dairy. I would roll it out into a long roll and sprinkle cinnamon and sugar on it and it makes the most amazing cinnamon bread. Pretty easy one too.

2 cups warm water (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)
2/3 cup white sugar
1 1/2 tablespoons active dry yeast
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1/4 cup vegetable oil
6 cups bread flour

Directions

In a large bowl, dissolve the sugar in warm water, and then stir in yeast. Allow to proof until yeast resembles a creamy foam.
Mix salt and oil into the yeast. Mix in flour one cup at a time. Knead dough on a lightly floured surface until smooth. Place in a well oiled bowl, and turn dough to coat. Cover with a damp cloth. Allow to rise until doubled in bulk, about 1 hour.
Punch dough down. Knead for a few minutes, and divide in half. Shape into loaves, and place into two well oiled 9x5 inch loaf pans. Allow to rise for 30 minutes, or until dough has risen 1 inch above pans.
Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 30 minutes.

BALSAMIC-GLAZED SALMON FILLETS

I have been wanting to try new fish recipes to see if we can work it into our routine meals more. Charles of course still wouldn't touch it but I LOVED this. It was so good. I doubled the sauce and used it as a little drizzle over brown rice. SO yummy.

6 (5 ounce) salmon fillets
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 tablespoon white wine
1 tablespoon honey
1/3 cup balsamic vinegar
4 teaspoons Dijon mustard
salt and pepper to taste
1 tablespoon chopped fresh oregano

Directions

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C). Line a baking sheet with aluminum foil, and spray with non-stick cooking spray.
Coat a small saucepan with non-stick cooking spray. Over medium heat, cook and stir garlic until soft, about 3 minutes. Mix in white wine, honey, balsamic vinegar, mustard, and salt and pepper. Simmer, uncovered, for about 3 minutes, or until slightly thickened.
Arrange salmon fillets on foil-lined baking sheet. Brush fillets with balsamic glaze, and sprinkle with oregano.
Bake in preheated oven for 10 to 14 minutes, or until flesh flakes easily with a fork. Brush fillets with remaining glaze, and season with salt and pepper. Use a spatula to transfer fillets to serving platter, leaving the skin behind on the foil.

More to come soon...those are just a few off the top of my head.

A little Love

2010-04-18T22:16:00.001-07:00

Just a few seriously cute ones of the love of siblings.

Cute Hairdo

2010-04-18T22:06:00.000-07:00

Looked online for a cute idea of something to do with Audrey's hair for church. I found THIS lady with an entire blog devoted to hair ideas!!!! For the love of mother's with little girls.....Here is the outcome

Ethan discovers his toes

2010-04-18T22:05:00.001-07:00

Yeah for $3 Goodwill toys

2010-04-18T22:02:00.000-07:00

So you don't feel bad when you hate them and want to throw them away!!!

This thing looks like so much fun, and is of course to Audrey. But it is so loud and annoying. I might try to stuff cotton into the speakers or something. Otherwise it might have to go to a nice, warm, caring home....any takers?

Little homeless girl

2010-04-18T22:01:00.000-07:00

This is what I found Audrey doing one day. She packed all her earthly possessions into that laundry basket. Maybe she thought the world was ending and she needed to get it all together. Who knows

Easter

2010-04-18T21:53:00.001-07:00

Easter was a nice time this year. We got to listen at home with just our little family to conference. I made us a nice breakfast to eat all together and then on to Lambs later for dinner and Easter egg hunt. So fun. Audrey liked opening all her easter things, and Ethan's too after all since he couldn't 'open' them.

I must be a true housewife to let myself be not only photographed without makeup, but then put it up for everyone to see.

I made the kids 'I spy' bags this year. Audrey got a duck and Ethan got a fish. They turned out cute. I got a few other little dollar section things. Audrey however to this day still refuses to actually wear this dress. I am not sure why. She never has an opinion about what she wears.

One of those moments that is super cute, but just didn't quite get captured on camera, because this is not a very cute picture.